The Adventures of Glenda and Lexie

This is Lexie trying to tell me something important. If I could just learn dog language we would have the most interesting conversations. 

Life is never dull for me. I will begin with my visitors on my deck a few weeks ago.

One evening, my darling Lexie, began going out on the deck and barking. 
After ignoring her for a while, I decided to open the door and turn on the light to see what had upset her.

As you can see in the photo above, an opossum had dropped by and found appealing the food that I had left for the birds.  I tried to shoo him away, but he would not move. He crouched a little bit and hissed at me. Lexie had calmed down once she knew I had seen the visitor. So, I said, "Mr. Possum, have fun. I am going inside."  Opossums are good animals who eat ticks and help keep us safe.

In a short time, Lexie began barking again. I went to the door and looked out. The opossum was still eating, but another creature had arrived. In back of the opossum, I saw four small feet clutching the post. I could not see the body that was behind the post until suddenly the new guest poked his head around to see me. The little bandit evidently thought he might chase off Mr. Oscar P. Opossum, and eat the remaining berries, but that was not to be. 

As soon as I opened the door to step out on the deck, Rocky Raccoon disappeared only to show up a few minutes later, his head cradled between the forks of a nearby tree. He was so cute, I had to laugh. I said to Lexie, "Come inside now and let them figure out who will eat the remainder of the berries." 

I never expected to find two wild animals on my deck here in the city. That did not happen in my home in the mountains. But the empty lot on one side of me here is forested and our back yard is left to the Ivey and wild flowers. Just as I learned to live with deer eating my Hosta in the mountains, I'll feed these small creatures and hope they will leave my suet feeders alone. 

I'll post about another recent adventure next time.

Be kind and enjoy every day. 

Up Early, and Take My Advice, Please

Sleep alludes me most nights. No matter what time I go to bed, I can't go to sleep until 2:30 or after. 
Going to bed is not easy for me. Before I turn in, I take a bunch of pills. 
With a heart condition and Diabetes I never miss my night time ritual. And, if I have been sitting for a long time, hours, I wake up with pain in my back, legs and feet. 

This morning, my diabetes sensor awakened me. It is incessant. I can't ignore it. When I checked, my reading was 69, too low. At the same time, I had sharp nerve pain in my feet. I had to get up, eat something with carbs, and take pain meds, stretch, and use heat and ice for my back and feet.

Although I didn't get enough sleep last night, I can take a nap today. No appointments on my calendar! 
Great. I will finish my Christmas Cards and get them in the mail today. Christmas is almost here.

Life is Good.

Even though I have frustration and problems every single day, I am grateful that I have a lovely home provided for me. I am so thankful to be living in the same house with two people I love who seem to want me here. And---they love Lexie, which makes all complete. 

She usually sleeps late and gets up when I do, so this morning, when I had to get up early, so did she. Now she is back asleep in a chair, one she has chosen to be her own, with her blanket. I love that little girl. 

Sleeping Beauty

Dealing with Customer Service drives me Nuts!

For weeks now I have spent hours and hours on the phone with employees of companies I used to use at my house in North Carolina, but no longer need. I realize I made a huge mistake many years ago when Barry and I signed with Frontier Communication for our landline telephone. We made the awful mistake of signing for the company to take our monthly fees directly from our checking account. 

It was a no worry answer to paying my bill on time each month. But all the worry has come now when I realized I have been paying this bill months after I called to cancel it and four months after I sold my house. I don't get a bill each month because I don't need to send in a payment. It comes up on my bank statement. For months I had overlooked the fact that Frontier was taking 80 plus dollars out of my bank account even though I had called and canceled the account. 

Then the problem began. I called Frontier, waited for a long time to talk to a human being who said my account had not been cancelled because I had not produced a PIN for that account. Believe me that was the first time I had heard anything about a PIN. The person on the phone could not help me. So I turned to my bank and found they are limited in stopping an automatic payment from my account. The best they could do was stop payment on the last month's withdrawal. Needless to say, my week has been spent mostly on struggling with Frontier personnel who all said the same thing. And here in December, they have taken another payment for a phone that I don't have from an address that has not been mine since September 4 when we closed on the sale of the house.

The good thing is Frontier has a record of my call to cancel back in May 2024. Finally, today, in desperation while dealing with yet another employee, who had me go to the computer to receive some information I had to complete, she said. But her email never came through.

 At that point I was tired and about to scream. But instead, I told this woman on the phone in a very angry tone, "I know it won't matter to you or change anything, but I have a heart condition and breast cancer which gives me lots of stress, and now Frontier is going to give me a stroke."

She was quiet for a minute. I said, "I am sure there is someone there who could take care of this problem."

"Hold on a minute. Let me talk to my supervisor." The line was quiet for awhile, then she came back on and said, "It's handled now. You will be refunded immediately for the past three months and then we will refund to your bank account the rest that is owed you."

Now, if they will do what they say, I will be most happy. But why didn't someone do this a week ago and before I spent hours on the phone with those who said they could do nothing to help me until I produced a PIN? Just speaking to her supervisor took care of it all, but no one, and I asked to speak to someone else, but not until I told them about my health issues did anybody care enough to help me.

It is this kind of frustration that drives me crazy. 

And I have run into more than one since making this move. My message to you is NEVER sign an automatic payment plan where they can take your money directly from your account. Sales people will push you to do that, but don't. 

I am a big fan of Clark Howard who has helped me with another fight with a big company, and he advises to never sign an automatic payment plan like I did. 

When others have heard about some of these problems with big companies that won't refund what is owed me, I have been told, "Well, that is too much trouble. I would just let it go. Forget about it."

But, I don't have an income where I can just give away over $500 to those who would take it from me.

Be safe out there, my friends. Hope you are having happy times during the holidays. 

Know who to trust.

Life is good. It is snowing. Enjoying Elderhood.

Here I am recovering from COVID and watching the snow falling beautifully. I have survived the virus thanks to having been vaccinated and having taken a booster shot. Gay, Stu, and I tested negative tonight and I am so relieved. With Gay taking care of me and being with me so much, I have been afraid she would catch it, but she has had her shots, too. 

The power was out when I awoke today and I was invited upstairs for breakfast brought in by Stu. Furniture had been rearranged in front of the gas log fireplace, both dogs had their beds near the flames. Lexie loves heat and she was happy. Soon the snow started falling and we could not have wished for a more perfect day. 

Stu is originally from Chicago, and unlike us southerners, he is not afraid to get out and drive in the snow. He even went to the park to take his daily walk. Years ago I would have gone out in the snow and loved it, but now I have to be careful that I don't fall. It is aggravating to have to be conscious all the time of where you put your feet and how you step so you don't twist the bad knee.  

But I can't complain. I loved this day and especially loved the results of the tests we took tonight for COVID. All three of us tested negative!!

I feel so much better. I made a pot of chili. I love chili on a cold day or night. 

Although I had some difficult days early this week, I believe I was spared hospitalization because I had all my vaccination shots including a booster. I also think that having an oximeter and oxygen available here kept me out of the hospital. When I checked my oxygen level and it was 92, I immediately put on the oxygen for about twenty minutes. I had been told to go to the emergency room if my oxygen level fell below 92.

My friend, Carroll, said most people wouldn't know their oxygen level. They would not have that little oxygen meter at home. I advise everyone to purchase an oximeter at their local pharmacy. There are many times I have used mine in the past. Because I have dealt with respiratory problems for a long time, I keep certain things on hand. No one is going to take care of you and manage your health as well as you can. We must all know our bodies, what affects us, what doesn't. 

One of the reasons I have two primary care doctors, one a western medical doctor and one is a functional care doctor, is because one keeps me up to date on the issues medical doctors treat, and the other, who is also an MD, has gone further in her education and can advise me about supplements for to take for certain problems, help me take tests that I want but are not covered by Medicare. With insurance companies running the medical profession now, I think my medical primary care doctor has her hands tied as to what she can do to help me. Limited to fifteen-minute appointments, I hardly get a chance to tell her what she needs to know to help me. And she only wants to hear one issue each visit. 

I want a doctor who treats the whole body, not one symptom at a time. Most people don't know that the drugs given to people my age have never been tested on anyone my age. Drug companies test their new drugs on middle-aged healthy people, mostly men.

Doctors have to guess at the dosage for someone like me and many times we are just guinea pigs testing the outcome of a medicine that was tested on forty-year-olds. If you read the label of most over-the-counter products, you will see dosage for children at different ages, but adults of all ages are to receive the same dose. Recently I was prescribed a medicine that was supposed to help me sleep. I was to take one tablet at night. I did that. Sometime in the night, I had to get up to go to the bathroom. I climbed out of bed and headed to the bathroom adjacent to my bedroom. Suddenly I found myself halfway down the hall going toward the living room. I had never done that before. I knew it was that new medicine. In many cases, older people react far differently to drugs than younger people.

There is a terrific book out that I am reading called Elderhood, by Louise Aronson, who is a leading geriatrician, educator, and professor of medicine at the University of California, San Francisco. She is not an old person herself, but she has studied and observed older people most of her career. 

She says that most of us will spend more years in elderhood than in childhood. 

So why is it that regular medicine makes little effort to cure the problems of older people? Elderhood is considered a dead-end for many doctors and they don't want to be geriatricians. They don't even want old people as patients. And frankly, as an older person, I don't want a young doctor who cannot relate to my problems or my attitude about my health.

Well, I will stop my lecture and you can read for yourself, this book that all should read no matter your age. If you are lucky you will one day need the information in this book and if you are young you might have parents that need you to understand what they need and how to go about caring for them.

At the present time, I am happy to be here and planning for my future. I have survived COVID and I hope I don't ever have to face it again. But if I do, I will be better prepared to do what I need to do to survive.

Stay safe, my friends. Be careful as you go about in this chaotic world and find something to smile about every day. 

A Second Home

Here I am snuggled into bed in my apartment.

On Christmas Eve, I slept here for the first time. I know what it means to be a minimalist now. Borrowed items from my sister's kitchen and the electric skillet I received at Christmas can be used to make my breakfast.  

The rooms are pretty bare, the cabinets and drawers are near empty. Strangely, I feel better here out of the clutter I live in at home. I am convinced that my own home makes me sick. I want to clear out most of what is in my house in the mountains. Much of it will be brought here, but not all of it! During the past two years, I lived almost all the time in my kitchen, dining and living area, and bedroom. When my dining room became my office, the clutter began to grow. I soon was drowning in paper. It seemed that my furniture grew or multiplied and my open space shrunk. One bedroom became a catchall space and no one could sleep there now. Clutter is bad for me, and I will do something about it when I go home.

I have two closets here at the apartment and love all that empty space. I brought some clothes and shoes and will leave most of them so when I come down in the future, I won't have so much to pack.

We had a quiet Christmas Day.

My nephew began to run a fever and felt unwell that morning, so his mother said she thought it best if we didn't come over.  

However it was fun opening presents with Gay and Stu and having our dinner here, just the three of us.

I did not get Christmas cards mailed as I have done in the past. I did send out some Email Christmas letters. I love the cards sent to me by friends and family.

It is so nice to be remembered and to hear from them.

I have a friend on my mind tonight. 

She has been taking chemo for the past year. She is in the hospital now and was under Hospice care at home until yesterday when she was moved to Asheville NC under strong pain meds. She is suffering so much.

That is why I support Compassion and Choices. I watched my sweet husband deal with the horrible pain of cancer and I know, if I had a choice, I would want to have a say in how I want to end my life. I think anyone who has watched a loved one suffer knowing there is no cure, would want that person free of pain more than anything. I know I felt that way with Barry. Unless someone tells the doctor what the patient wants and what the family wants, the doctors will continue to prolong the suffering as that is what they think they are supposed to do.

HOSPICE

My friend, Ellen, a doctor who works in a Hospice Center, says many relatives or close family members will insist they do everything possible to prolong the life of the patient even if he/she is suffering great pain and has no chance of recovering. 

Don't we suffer enough just living with our illnesses and aches and pains, with our losses and griefs? Why make us suffer even more at the end of our lives? 

I am grateful for my kind and loving sister and brother-in-law who do so much for me, even providing a relaxing retreat for me. Lexie is not sure she wants to stay here, but she finally decided, if she couldn't go upstairs with Gay and Smokie, she would stay with me. In her own bed, she is curled up and is sleeping away.

ACCEPT AND MOVE ON

I am trying to look at the positives in my life the past two years instead of dwelling on the things that have been tough, and the changes that will likely be permanent. We must accept those changes and move on in new ways to enjoy our lives.

Hope you have escaped COVID and will have a happy and healthy new year.

 

Christmas Season, joyful, festive, sad and sorrowful

"I’ve found that this time of year requires a delicate dance. You may be feeling festive, joyful, or celebratory one moment, and then all of a sudden feel flooded with emotions from holidays of the past. You may find yourself missing people who are no longer part of your life, longing for traditions you no longer have, or struggling to implement new traditions. You may find yourself caught up in the madness and then find yourself trying to do your part to do less and keep it simple."  Maria Shriver's latest I've Been Thinking column.

Maria Shriver seems to write about exactly what is going on with me and in my life. I subscribe to her newsletter which comes to my Inbox each Sunday.

This is the most unusual Christmas ever in my life.

First, I have no holiday decor in my house or outside of my house. In fact, a small Thanksgiving plaque is hanging near my door. I do plan to take it down before I leave for Christmas.

I have been busy ordering gifts for Gay and Stu and a couple of close friends. I don't go out to shop in the stores now. Health issues that cause lots of pain, keep me from enjoying the stores as I once did. I loved going to the malls where Christmas music met me at the door and filled my heart with happiness. Amazon and other online shopping stores make my life easier, but this year I had most of the gifts mailed to my sister's house in Roswell, GA because I was afraid they would not arrive in Hayesville before I leave. 

I will be wrapping boxes on Christmas Eve. Due to a recent bout with unrelenting pain, I accomplished nothing at all for the past few days. Just tried to sleep as much as possible because when I am sleeping I am not hurting. 

My friend, Raven, came over Saturday to help me with some things like loading a chair in my car. 

She is unbelievably generous and caring. She brought Buddy, her little dog who is about the size of Lexie, so they could play in the backyard. Lexie was more interested in Raven, her new best friend, and followed her when she took Buddy out of the gate. In a split second, Lexie realized she was free and took off down the street. Luckily, Lexie came when Raven drove her truck nearby and dropped some treats on the ground. I was in my car going after my little escape artist when I saw Raven coming with Lexie on a leash.

After the bad week I had, I was not ready to face losing my little cuddle buddy. I am so glad Lexie came to Raven and did not continue running as she often does with me.

As I might have said before, I deal with several health issues that torment me at times. In recent weeks, I have had two relapses of TN, a nerve disorder that is often brought on by a reaction to chemicals such as perfume, scented products or cleaning supplies. Now I am having sharp pains in my face and neck, but I think my mouth is involved. This time it seems to be a Temporomandibular joint dysfunction and has been very hard to get over.

So those are some of the negative issues for me this Christmas, but I look forward to going down to my sister's beautifully decorated house for Christmas. I will not be making the cornbread dressing for Christmas dinner this year. Just not up to it. But we will have a wonderful dinner at the home of Lee, my niece, and her husband Dave. Dave is an excellent cook and he does the bulk of the cooking. Stu, my BIL, makes the sausage stuffing like his dad made. 

My Cornbread dressing usually made at holiday times

I hope to move into my apartment at the Morings' house when I go down there this time. The only thing holding us up, I'm told, is the stairlift that waits to be installed when the installer can get to it. 

I am excited to see what has been done since I was last in Roswell. I love the paint on the walls, the cabinets in the kitchen, and the vanity. I saw them when I was there at Thanksgiving. But now the floors are in and I know that makes a big difference. 

So, Christmas will be a happy time when I can be with family and when I can get into my new home away from home. Send me positive vibes for a pain-free and drive down south this week. 

I hope your holidays are fun and healthy and that you spend some time, face to face or virtual with loved ones.

Banana pudding made by Gay for holidays. This is Mother's recipe

We always remember our loved ones when we gather for meals, especially Barry, June, and Mother. As long as we remember and speak of them, they will be with us.
. . 

Lost in the Attic

I hope all of my readers, my friends, had a wonderful Thanksgiving this year. 

The weekend is almost over as I sit at my sister's house and write this post. I loved being with family for the holidays.

See Thanksgiving pictures here.

The apartment Gay and Stu are creating for me is coming along nicely. I will have a small kitchen, a very nice walk-in shower in the bathroom with a pretty vanity and mirror.

Today Gay and I sat on the covered deck overlooking the lake. The weather was perfect with sunshine and a slight breeze. The temperature was just as I like it. Cool and crisp. I look forward to sitting there in the future.

I want to take Lexie down to see if she will try to get out of the deck which opens to her fenced area.

She scared Gay and me to death yesterday. We could not find her in the house. Neither of us had gone outside, so we didn't see any way she could be out of the house.

Finally, I said to Gay, "Did she follow you upstairs this morning?" Gay has a large room upstairs which she uses for storage. I had gone to the foot of the stairs and called Lexie, but heard nothing.

Suddenly, Gay had a light bulb moment. "She might have gone up there with me, but I didn't notice." She headed for the stairs. "I wonder if she went into the crawl space. If she did, she could be anywhere up there." I climbed the stairs with Gay right behind me. She headed to a large opening in the back corner. "The electrician left this open and I can't close it," she said. We both called for Lexie again promising her treats if she would come to us.

Gay went to a closed door on the opposite side of the room, opened it, and called "Lexie. Lexie!" 

"She couldn't get in there with the door closed," I said. 

"If she went into that other space, she could be back in here. I heard her little feet overhead when I was in the kitchen." Behind that door that no one had entered for a long, long time, Lexie could be lost.

We called and called. "I hear her coming," Gay said. In a few minutes, my little 12-pound buddy appeared, happy to be found and excited to see us. 

Gay said, "She went into that large opening but found herself in the attic where she could go from one end of the house to the other. I guess she forgot how she got there."

We were very relieved to get her back, and we learned that when curious Lexie is present, we have to check out the premises to be sure she can't go where she should not.

Lexie sleeping soundly

A DAY LATE AND A DOLLAR SHORT

Lexie loves to ride in the car. Looks like she is hiding here.

A day late and a dollar short. I heard this saying often when I was growing up. It means too late and too feeble to achieve the desired effect. That fits me right now.

I am a day late writing this post for my blog. Life has been very busy, but also trying at times lately.

I was in Roswell, Ga all last week, but I was busy or under the weather much of the time. Thankfully my physical problems have nothing to do with the pandemic, with this latest surge of COVID, although hospitals in my area are overflowing with patients and there are no rooms in the ICU for them. Ambulances must wait sometimes six hours at the hospitals because there are no beds for the sick. I can't imagine how awful it would be to have a heart attack or a stroke and have no access to the medical services in the area. Some have had to be airlifted to hospitals miles away.

But, I have much for which to be grateful. I am working with Gay and Stu to remodel their daylight basement which will be comfortable and is where I will stay when I go and visit them. This means I can stay there much longer than I do now. It means my little friend, Lexie, will not interfere with their lives as she and I will have our own bedroom, living, dining rooms with a nice large private bathroom.  The front door opens onto a covered deck that overlooks a pretty little lake. With wooded strips on both sides of the yard, I will have almost as much privacy as I do at my mountain house. And the wildlife is tremendous. I once saw a huge owl and deer come through every day. Birds come to the lake and light in the tall trees. Lexie will have her own yard and a pet door so she can come and go when she wants. 

If I ever sell my mountain house, I can move into that apartment to live permanently. This is a relief for me as I have been in limbo about my future. 

Now that I am in lockdown and dealing with isolation again, I think about how nice it will be to have my sister, my brother-in-law, and my niece and her family nearby. 

I am already packing things to take down there. We hope it will be finished by December. 

Last week we had a scare when my brother was admitted to the hospital with pneumonia. 

This is the second time this has happened since he survived COVID last year. He is a tough one. Back at home now, he is weak, but in good spirits. Perhaps his tough constitution and desire to live is why he is in his nineties now. 

September is slipping up on me too fast!

I will begin teaching a writing class on Zoom Monday, September 26. Those who are interested in taking my class, Writing Memories into True Life Stories, must register with the Institute of Continuing Learning. www.ICL/YHC.org I will teach six weeks, two hours each week, and the cost is only $20. We have such a good time in my classes and we all meet new people and make new friends. And everyone learns what they need to know to write about their lives. Because this class is on Zoom, anyone who has Internet and can get on Zoom will be able to participate. 

Visit my other site, www.glendacouncilbeall.com to learn more about what is happening for writers and poets in our area. 

 

Do you listen to or read books by Dr. Brené Brown? Gratitude

I am a fan of Dr. Brené Brown who speaks on vulnerability and shame. She also talks about gratitude and other things that help us with life’s problems. The following is an excerpt from one of her pages and in her words.

"There is a great quote by a Jesuit priest that says, “It’s not joy that makes us grateful, it’s gratitude that makes us joyful.”  Practicing gratitude invites joy into our lives.

Practice is the part that really changed my life, that really changed my family and the way we live every day. When I say practice gratitude, don’t mean “the-attitude-of-gratitude” or feeling grateful, I mean practicing gratitude."

Dr. Brown goes on to say, "These folks shared in common a tangible gratitude practice. Some of them kept gratitude journals. Some of them did interesting things like at 1,2,3,4 or 12:34 every day they said something out loud that they were grateful for in their lives."

One of the things Brown's family does is say grace at dinner. And so now, after learning about practicing gratitude, after grace they go around and everyone says something that they are  thankful for.

"What’s interesting," Dr. Brown says, "is when we first started, I thought my children were going to say, Oh, mom, are you experimenting on us? There was a little bit of that. But after we had done this for a couple weeks, even on those crazy, busy nights, when we were trying to get to soccer, piano and homework, if Steve and I said a quick prayer and start eating, my kids were like, Woah…what are you grateful for?”

….My son often says, I’m grateful for bugs. I’m grateful for frogs. But sometimes he’ll say, I’m grateful that you picked me up early. Or I’m grateful that I finally understand adjectives.”

End of excerpt.

When a friend of Brené Brown’s daughter lost her mother, the daughter said, “I’m grateful that my parents and family are healthy.”  I am sure many young people feel that, but how often do they say it?

I love this idea of saying out loud what we are grateful for each day. I often think about gratitude when I awake each morning. Years ago I kept a gratitude journal and wrote down five things each day for which I was grateful, but I plan to say out loud what I am grateful for. 

While life is hard now, I know we will one day see a brighter light. I am grateful for all the people in my life now that make every day better. I am a person who needs to be useful, and I am finding new ways to do that even when I am at home and physically isolating myself from the rest of the world.

I am grateful that I rescued a puppy who turned around and rescued me.

My six pound rescued puppy, Lexie, is now twelve pounds and still leaps and jumps like a pup.

What are you most grateful for at this difficult time?

This perfect weekend is almost over.

I did not have a big expensive party, or dinner or even go anywhere. I stayed home, in my mountain house, all weekend with Lexie, my buddy and sweet friend. We had no visitors and no long phone calls with family or friends. For these two days I was totally mindful, as I understand it.

I did only what brought me joy. 
Listening to the rain and distant thunder gave me a peaceful feeling. Watching the leaves of the oak trees so close to my window as they danced in the wind, wet with the precious rain, made me smile.

Lying on my sofa watching a history-based story with period costumes on my TV with Lexie curled up in the circle made by my knees and the back of the sofa opened my heart and filled it with gratitude for all I have.

Waking in the early morning in my own bed, knowing I could sleep for awhile longer if I wished, with no pressure to get up and do something. What a blessing that is. No one needs me to do anything I don't want to do. I can sleep and sleep is such a healing practice for me. Eight or more hours of sleep banish pain in my body. Works better than pills and shots.

Having time - precious time - to do just what I want to do, reminded me that I have too much going on in my life, going and doing, and I asked myself, "What do I really want to do with the precious life I have left?"

In October I have another birthday, and it is a milestone, marking the weight of the Third Act of Glenda's Life. What will the next year hold for me? Every year I vow to reach out to family and friends, those who live far away and those who live near me. It seems to me, I never do enough. I am always so busy with other things. But I know that whatever I can do to make my loved ones know I care for them and that they are in my thoughts, is more than doing nothing.

One of my favorite things to do is listen to educational podcasts. I did that this weekend. I am a life-long learner, but I would not like to sit in classes for hours a day or be required to write or discuss my thoughts.

Having time to listen to others, agree or disagree with them, was one of the most delightful things about this weekend. I had time to digest what I heard and make up my mind as to what I believed. 

I intentionally avoided the news of the day, of the world, and found my life more relaxed and at peace. Why should I hear all the awful things reported when there is nothing I can do about it? Instead, I listened to music. I danced and I sang. 

I became aware this weekend, alone with my thoughts and with my little Lexie, that the worst of grieving the loss of Barry, my husband of 45 years, is finally beginning to wane and I can finally say, I am happy just being with me and my things in my place. 

I am enough. I don't need anyone else to make me happy or full-filled. Do you feel that way, those of you who have lost your beloved people? 

I knew in the fall of 2009 that I would go on with my life, and that I must do something to fill the time, but must also do something beneficial to others. For ten years I have taught senior adults to write about their lives. I have provided a place for writers to come and learn from excellent poets and writers. I was inspired to teach by my mentor, the late Nancy Simpson, poet and friend.  I was encouraged by other writers and friends and appreciated by many of them. I am grateful to writers, Karen Paul Holmes, Joan Howard, many of my guest instructors, who never fail to let me know their thoughts on what I do. 

Mary Mike Keller and Estelle Rice, visual and literary artists and my best friends, have been there for years through my mourning time and through theirs. How many have friends like that?

Also this weekend, I smiled when I thought of my sister, Gay, who is having the time of her life. She is dancing two or three times each week with wonderful dancers who let her finally do for herself what she always enjoyed most. After years of taking care of loved ones and being there for others, she has made the decision to do what she loves to do. The joy in her voice is exhilarating. It reminds me: We should never think it is too late to follow our dreams. 

It is never too late to make a change in who we are. It is never too late to stop and let life show us who we are and what we really want. Be still and listen. 

So, my dear readers, although you have been there through my pain and sorrow, welcome to my happiness. I hope your weekend has been all you wanted it to be. See you next week when I hope to have my essay on John Cecil Council finished and posted.


Leave me a comment or email me: gcbmountaingirl@gmail.com 

Monday, a day for learning some things, but a bad drive home

My drive home from Roswell, GA yesterday took six hours instead of two. I knew it would be a bit longer as I had a doctor's appointment that would take about 1 1/2 hours. Lexie was with me.

We left my sister's at 1:00 p.m.. That gave me time to fill up my tank before I reached Hwy 575 in Woodstock, GA. Once I pulled onto the ramp I noticed the traffic was bad. Little did I know that up ahead an accident would make my short trip to Canton, GA almost an hour long.

I needed to call about my appointment, but my cell phone would not charge. It was dead. I made it to the appointment 30 minutes late. When I left the office, I walked Lexie a bit and then put her in the car. I did not notice that I had left a window open. I removed her leash and she immediately found the open window. Out she flew and out I flew to try to catch her before she ran into the traffic. Three others joined in my chase but Lexie was not coming to any of us. We spent what seemed like ages trying to catch her but she ran far down the road behind the office building. I thought she would not ever be found once she disappeared from my view. I jumped into my car and headed around the buildings to the road where I could see her. But when I got to the area where I had seen her she was not there. I drove on down the road and finally turned around.

That was when I met one of the people helping me search. "She is in Robin's office. She came back to the parking lot and he has her."

Thanks to Robin, a man with a small dog on a leash, I have my runner back home. She followed his dog into his office and he closed the door. 

By then I was hungry and needed to find a Verizon store to fix my phone. Lucky the man at the store opened my phone, took out the battery, rubbed it and blew into the cavity where it fits, then put the battery back in. He placed my phone, an old flip phone which I love, into his charger and it lit up. By then it was nearly five o'clock and I was a long way from home. So I stopped and had ribs for dinner.

When I I drove into my driveway long after dark, I was tired and weary. I brought in only the basic things I needed and then brought in Lexie. She is on my black list at this time and she is getting no special love. We are definitely going to enroll in an obedience class very soon.

She knows she was bad and she has some work to do to make up for giving me cardiac arrest.

Dogs, Dogs, Dogs

I have spent this hot weekend indoors with three precious dogs. Yes, I am baby-sitting for Gay and Stu who are attending a wedding.

Dogs have different personalities. Sunny, the Maltese mix, is cute as can be, but she lets everyone know she is Alpha Dog. If Smokie, the sweet little miniature Schnauzer, comes near where she is sleeping, Sunny growls like she is going to have Smokie for lunch. 

Sweet Smokie

Alpha Dog, Sunny

Now throw Lexie in the mix. Lexie is not afraid of Sunny and challenges her for Alpha status. But Lexie is younger and is more interested in playing than in fighting to be top dog. While I sit at my computer they all sleep in their respective places. Lexie loves her crate and sleeps curled up in a ball. Sunny usually sleeps on a pink blanket on the floor of the dining room where I am working, but today she has taken over Smokie's bed just to my right. 

Smokie, who challenges no one for authority, sits on a mat and looks at me as if to say, "Can't you make her give me my bed?" 

I try to encourage Smokie to come past Sunny and take the pink blanket, but as soon as Smokie gets close to Sunny, the boss leaps up in her face and growls like a lion in a cage. So the schnauzer goes back to the mat and finally curls up there and sleeps. 

Last night as I was preparing for bed and getting ready to let all three of them stay with me, I heard the fiercest of battles begin behind me. I turned and Sunny and Lexie were on the bed going at each other. I yelled at them, but they did not stop. I then tried to reach and pull Sunny toward me so Lexie could jump off the bed, but no, Lexie had decided that no one was going to take her place on my bed next to me. I think it was all a bit of jealousy, but they really frightened me. Even after I held Sunny away from Lexie, my little one would not stop attacking Sunny. 

I never had a problem with my dogs and Gay's and Stu's dogs, but in the past I always had a male. My male dogs never challenged their female dogs for their food or attention. Rocky let Smokie chew on his legs and his neck when she was a puppy and he never even growled - not once. I think it is jealousy that upsets the apple cart with these girls. 

Rocky licked Smokie to show her how much he loved her

Lexie is used to having all my attention and not sharing me with anyone. Sunny is used to being the top dog and doesn't plan to give that position up anytime soon. Sweet Smokie just sits and looks at me with those pitiful eyes, and I feel guilty that I don't take her in my lap and hold her. I know her mom would do that. But I have been at my computer and cannot type and hold a pup.

Well it is time to feed them. They are good about eating together, but I have to watch Sunny. She will take Smokie's food if she gets a chance. And I will be sure she doesn't try to sneak any of Lexie's. I don't want another dog fight tonight.

Lexie likes to be near me even if she is  on the chair beside me. 

After Christmas - what now?

Christmas is over and life goes back to normal. 

Normal for  me will be training my puppy. She was an excitable little girl with her cousins to bark at and play with and with so many new people to jump on and faces to lick. January is going to be a time of concentrated training where I will learn how to control Lexie and she will learn that I am Alpha in this family.

I joined family and friends this Christmas for laughter and lots of good food. So much good food!! My niece Lee and her husband Dave, had us over for a great dinner. Dave cooked the most delicious tenderloin, and we brought our side dishes. Lee had fallen and dislocated her elbow a couple of days before but even with her arm in a sling, she was an excellent hostess.

Lyn Hunter, Real Estate Agent

We all congratulated Lyn who passed the test for her NC real estate license. Now she is licensed in Georgia and North Carolina. I hope she sells many, many houses in 2016, continuing her trend of pleasing clients.

Old friends Dick and Linda visited and brought a smoked turkey. Dick smokes a turkey every Christmas and shares with us. This year we vented about how fast the  world is changing including popular music.  We hate the way modern singers murder old familiar Christmas Carols. Why do they have to change the tunes we all love? In years to come, will the songs we have sung from childhood be jazzed up and made impossible for us to sing along?

We also discussed the  need for a landline phone even if you have cell phones. Cell phones often have no signal or lose signal while you are in the midst of a conversation. Between Murphy NC and Hayesville, NC we get no cell signal at all at certain places. My sister calls one of my nieces who cancelled her landline and uses only a cell phone and the signal drops out or is very sketchy when my niece is on her cell at home. We believe that just because something is new doesn't make it better. I will keep my landline which I can be sure will reach anyone I need in an emergency.  

Summer  weather in December??

Record warm temperatures in Atlanta required turning off the heat and going to air conditioning. I wish I had taken more summer clothes for the visit. Shorts or capris would have felt good with short sleeved shirts. The unusual weather brought bad storms and tornadoes to Mississippi andAlabama. It saddened me to  hear about the Christmas presents scattered up and down the streets and decorated trees thrown about as houses crashed down killing a number of people.

In our own joy we also stopped to be thankful for all our blessings and to think about those people who had lost so much.

Now I’m ready to head into a new year, to accomplish goals I’ve set and to stay as healthy as possible to complete my obligations to others.

Christmas Gift - Mine is already here.

Jingle bells, jingle bells, I hear them ringing constantly. No, I’m not riding in a one-horse open sleigh. I am hearing Lexie’s bell on her collar. It never stops ringing unless she has finally worn herself out playing non-stop.

Lexie at 3 months and five pounds 

I could not find a collar with a bell on it among the fancy and plain ones on the rack for dogs, extra small or large.  But cat collars often have attached bells to signal the birds when the cat tries to creep up on them. My tiny little Lexie now sports a red collar with a jingle bell as well as a blue collar, the only one she has not yet taken off.  

The bell drives us crazy, and I suppose I should take it off, but I don’t trust my baby girl just  yet. She is quick and moves as silently as a  sunbeam. She often grabs things in her mouth that she should not have, so I stay alert to her ringing in hopes of knowing exactly where she is at all times.

Like a human child at two years old, my four month old puppy is curious, easily distracted or attracted to a voice, a laugh, a movement and anything on the floor. Today she found a frozen green bean that had escaped the pot. It kept her busy for a time. I try to keep her plied with toys and puzzles. She loves a challenge – like managing to thwart my efforts to fence her off the stairs, or keep her in a play pen those times I can’t  watch her.

Play Pen for pups - light weight, with zip cover

I think my sister Gay found a way to contain a busy, energetic little dog. She bought a puppy pen with a cover. Now Lexie can’t jump out. But when we first put her in it, we howled with laughter. She jumped up on the sides and her weight pushed the pen over – and over and  over as she rolled down the hall and into the  kitchen where we had gone. We might put her in a pen and leave her, but Lexie doesn’t give up. She just rolled the pen to where we had gone.

Finally we figured out that we needed to add weight to the canvas and mesh container. Eighteen pounds of hand weights on the floor of the pen keeps it in place and she cannot roll it over. She actually learned to like it, at least for an hour at the time.

I’m so  happy that  she has not bothered the Christmas tree or the presents. But I don’t think any doggie gifts have yet been placed there.

Lexie has already taught me many things. First, I can now type with a seven pound dog lying across my forearms. I can get up early and take her outside when I am not yet awake. I can carry seven pounds up and down my stairs. Although I had said I would never make the mistake of having a little dog sleep in my bed, I learned I actually enjoy a small cuddly pup curling up against me when I sleep, waking me with  puppy kisses and playing in my hair.

I had forgotten the delight of scooping into my arms a puppy who cries with excitement and anticipation when I come home. 

Without love, life would not be worth living, whether  the love of one person, a family, traditional or not, or a little furry creature who adores you and you go daft over. We human beings seem to never learn that to love is to risk losing that love. If we learn, we forget and love again and again when the time is right, when we can’t stand the quiet or stillness of our lives another minute.

I gave my heart away to four special dogs in the past and bore the pain of their deaths. I had told myself that I would never again let myself in for that grief. Like my aunt Judy after she lost Dixie, her beloved Eskimo Spitz, years ago, I felt I could not deliberately open my heart for more hurt. But here I am again in love with a dear little bundle of fur with alert eyes that look deep into my being. I almost see her brain turning  over and over the diverse options she has before she charges with direct decision into her next play.  

She befuddles me  with her eager actions and her confidence that all who come into  her  world will turn into babbling fools. They will hug and  kiss her, talk in strange tongue, and want to take her home. 

Gay, Dixie, Glenda on the right

Of course it is likely she will outlive me since little dogs of her sort can live 15 or more years. But I think we will grow old together, side by side, through tough times and during the times when skies are blue. Already my family is smitten with Lexie, and so are my friends. They tell me she has made a difference in me, and we have only been together for about two months.

I have already received  my best gift this year, and I plan to enjoy it for many Christmases to come.

Other posts you might like:

Holiday Memories 

Is there anything more fun than a new puppy?