Self-discipline - where is it when you need it?

Don't you hate it when you have a good day planned and suddenly you don't feel you can make it? That is what happened to me today. My friend, Estelle, and I planned to get together and submit some of our work, but I had to cancel. I was going to help her with electronic submissions which I learned more about in Robert King's class at the Moss Library recently. 

Estelle and I have many poems and short prose pieces stored away that have never seen the light of day. We talk about our plans on the phone, but life keeps getting in the way of doing what we plan. In my case life, lately, has come in the form of some malady that keeps me feeling blah all the time. At first it came with pain in my back and my front, but now with a wonderful chiropractor, Dr. Rob Peck, my back pain is gone, unless I lift something or sit at the computer too long. 

I have been counseled to try a gluten-free diet. I did some research and even bought a few gluten-free items at the grocery store, but I am not thrilled with what I've found. I made gluten-free biscuits that turned out pretty well, but I used a biscuit mix and the sugar content is high. It seems that rice and oats are Okay but most bread, rye, whole wheat, and white wheat, the ones I like, are made with gluten and therefore off my diet. So, how can I make a sandwich? Right now with fresh tomatoes available, how can I have a BLT? 

I wonder if I bought a bread machine, could I make bread with rice flour or gluten-free ingredients?

Dr. Peck even thinks I should avoid dairy! If I can't have cheese and butter, and bread, what is left that's good? I remember my father saying, when he was about my age, "Eating is about the only enjoyment I have left."

I still find quite a few things that are fun besides eating, but our social lives are built around food, having lunch with friends, going on a picnic, looking forward to a special dinner at a nice restaurant. 

Food was not high on Barry's list. He could go all day and not think about eating. He ate to live and that was it. His favorite meals consisted of hot dogs or pizza. But I made sure his meals included vegetables and fresh foods when I cooked for him. After his heart attack, when he was in his early fifties, he relied on me to cook heart healthy for him. I did my best. He dutifully ate turnip greens, cabbage, green beans and salads. 

I think I could eat gluten free if only I had someone come in and prepare that food for me. But when I go into my kitchen, I seem to only think of what I want, not what I should eat. And lately my GI tract is not food-friendly - not even for those old comfort foods I used to eat. 

I daydream about going to a fancy spa and having someone plan healthy meals and activities that bring back my energy and enthusiasm. Sounds like I have no self-discipline, doesn't it? I am just tired of having to think about food - what I can or cannot eat - what to buy at the store - what to do with what I have in my pantry and refrigerator. 

One of my affirmations I read each day says, "You've got everything you need to succeed. Believe it!" 

I believe I can do what I need to do to get back on the road to good health. I'll begin tomorrow.

Do you have any advice on how to stick with a diet or plan? Have you had success with gluten free living?

How Can I Have More Fun?

This past weekend, I found time to work on organizing my office. It is not ready to show, mind you, but it is far better than it was. I learned something through all the tossing and stashing and filing --I need to clean out my closet so I will have a place for those boxes sitting on the floor of the office.

I also heaved a big sigh of relief as I listed my priorities for the coming summer. I am going to do more things for fun! When I had Barry with me, we always found time to play - to go on the lake, take a day trip, go to a new restaurant for lunch, take in a mountain festival such as the Highland Games coming up in Blairsville, GA. I realized how I have become obsessed with my work. I enjoy what I do, but everyone needs time to play, to get away from everyday life. 

Relinquishing responsibilities for Coffee with the Poets, the planning and promoting of the monthly event, has been extremely helpful and now, Robert King, poet, editor and former publisher of FutureCycle Press has set up a new and improved online presence for Netwest. I am excited to see what he has done and will get a tour of the new website tomorrow. Although I will have administrative privileges on the new site, he will do most of the work. I can't thank him enough. 

I have a few more sessions of my Healing Through Writing classes at my studio. This is a great class with some delightful students who are enthusiastic and willing to try new things. I don't plan to teach an ongoing class again until next spring. My schedule for Writers Circle Studio is full for the season. We have some excellent teachers of writing and poetry such as Scott Owens of Hickory, NC, Karen Holmes of Atlanta and Hiawassee, GA, Carol Crawford of Blue Ridge, GA, Robert Lee Brewer, editor for Writers Digest from the Atlanta area, and Will Wright, poet, who was a big hit with our group last year.

I am continuing as Interim Program Coordinator for NCWN West (Netwest) and hope this office will be filled by July. My recommendation for the job is Ellen Schofield. She has a beautiful family history blog, writes well and is willing to take the time needed to lead our organization. I am impressed with all the letters of praise for her past work. 

My students plan a memoir critique group which we hope to get off the ground soon, and I am still very interested in organizing a book club to read only regional writers, those who are published by small independent presses or even those who are self-published. I see the frustration of the writers who can't find a marketplace for their books, as well as the book stores who are afraid of ordering  books from unknown authors and independent presses who can't afford to take returns. Perhaps as a book club we can filter out the best books from those that aren't too good, and recommend them either online or to shops in the area.

Tonight I received word from Scott Owens that Poetry Day at Catawba College in Hickory, NC will be April 26, 2014. I am so happy to be a part of this event, thanks to Scott, and will definitely plan to be there.

I am fortunate that my life is filled to the brim, filled with interesting people, interesting projects, and things to look forward to. I never get bored, just tired. And because of that, I need more time to relax and "smell the roses." Got any ideas for fun days for me? My list is not very long, yet.