Virtual Funeral

Even though I gripe and complain about all the new technology, today I deeply appreciate the ability to see on my computer screen a special occasion taking place many miles from me.

I attended the funeral of my brother's wife, my dear friend, Salita, because Mathews Funeral Home in Albany, GA. live-streamed the service which took place, not inside, but outside at the cemetery.

It was as if I were there with my brother, Max, and his family in the Council Family Cemetery on the farm where I grew up.

To see the old oak tree in the background and the pastures where I rode my horse, brought up a longing to go back to the time my mother and daddy were living, my brothers, my sister, June, her husband Stan were still here. I watched a much-loved friend and family member laid to rest. I heard her granddaughter speak of the love she poured out for all those around her. 

She was loved and she loved.

My eyes brimmed with tears as we listened to the tribute for a woman who was a homemaker, mother, wife, and friend to so, so many. We heard how generous she was to children in need. When her four sons were growing up, their friends filled the house, and Salita always welcomed them to the table loaded with good southern cooking. Christmas was a special time, and she wanted the biggest tree decorated and surrounded with gifts for her family. Wrapping gifts together until the wee hours of the morning and being there for that big breakfast on Christmas morning are memories that will linger with her children and grandchildren and will be passed down over the years.

The minister spoke of the love her sons had always felt from their mother and the love they had for her. All four sons still live nearby and so do their children. Only one grandchild is far away and he is in the Marines.

I feel that I went home today.

I had heard others say they have attended virtual funerals and weddings, but this was my first, and it took place on the land where I spent more than half my life.  I liked that I could hear the remembrance I wrote for Salita read by her granddaughter.

Having lost so many family members and realizing there are only three of the seven siblings living today, my own mortality looms darkly on the horizon. One day my ashes will probably be there in the serene country cemetery with those who have passed on. My heart aches for my brother and his family. And I mourn for a friend I have known since I was twelve years old. 

Salita and Max Council and their granddaughter, Carrie Council

 

One doesn't have to be famous, have thousands of friends on Facebook, have great wealth, win awards, or change the world to be important and special. If one loves freely and helps others when and however they can, that is all that is needed. Salita will forever be remembered as one who loved and gave all she had to make others happy, especially those who needed her. What more could one ask?

The Way We Were

Today while reading Dana Wildsmith's blog post, I realized that my writing has changed or evolved over the years. I don't write the way I used to write. I sometimes find documents, stories or memoir pieces that I think I wrote but am not sure because I did not put my name on them at the time. I would never want to plagiarize someone's writing, so I can't share it as my own since I am not sure. I wonder if my readers have had that happen to them.

I don't have problems with my poetry because so much of it is autobiographical, and I recognize it as my own. Dana writes about how her writing has changed over the years and even if she knows it is her work, she doesn't recognize that writer that she once was. 

I am using this weekend to gather my writings, memoir and short stories, into files where I can self-publish them one day soon. I don't plan on reaching a large audience, but I would certainly like for my family to have the pieces I have written about my parents, my siblings and my ancestors I have researched over the years. 

My neighbors said they don't think their adult children would be interested in their family stories. I think they would be interested, but it might be after their parents have passed on. I notice that it is not until the parents die that their children and grandchildren wish they had asked more questions and had written down the history of the family for generations to come. 

Every time I talk with my older brother on the phone, I ask him to tell me his memories about our family and I learn something new each time. He was born years before I was, so he remembers the day I was born and the place I was born. He remembers when and how our family moved to the farm where I grew up, and he can tell me details I never heard before. I hope his own children are hearing his stories and will remember them always. 

Max, Gay and me at 2013 family Christmas party

My brother, Max, has composed beautiful songs in his life. Some of them he sang with his brothers when they were the Council Brothers Quartet, and many of them he sang with his lovely wife in their later years. Even today after her memory has diminished, she will sit down to the piano and play music they sang together. Max says she remembers the words better than he does.  I wish his children or grandchildren would record them before it is too late. 

I often think Max is more of an artist than any of his siblings. He has drawn and painted birds that are perfect. He creates poetry and song lyrics, sings and is a story teller. He has never been taught by an artist, a poet or a song writer. Completely self-taught, he amazes me. 

This photo goes way back to when Max, and his wife, Salita, were young. Their first two sons are in this photo. I babysat these kids. 

I reached out today to a long time friend I haven't seen in years. She and I plan to meet in October some place where we can social distance and catch up on our lives. Even if we are not able to get together as we once did, we must keep up our connections with those we care for and enjoy. 

Well, this gloomy looking day is about over and I still have many things to do. I hope you are enjoying your weekend, my friends. Stay well and safe.

Visit www.glendacouncilbeall.com for an interesting post by my friend, Roger Carlton.