Living in a small town

This newspaper clipping was found among my mother-in-law's belongings, and I recently came across it while going through boxes of Beall information.

It reminds me of how small towns are very different from big cities. Obituaries in small-town newspapers are written so the reader knows who has died and who he was related to in the town. Because all the residents of Rockmart GA knew who Mrs. Beall was, it was appropriate to say the woman who died was Mrs. Beall's mother.

Mrs. Beall's Mother Dies Suddenly Sat. It looks like a news item, which I am sure it was. The Mrs. Beall in the headline was my mother-in-law, Helen Alexander Beall, who was co-owner of a popular dress shop. Her mother was Mrs. Roy P. Alexander, and the Alexanders were a well-known family in Roopville, south of Rockmart. 

Now that I no longer live in the small town of Hayesville, NC, I subscribe to their online version of the Clay County Progress, the weekly newspaper.

The obituaries are usually written by a family member, and some laud the interests of the deceased as well as listing the family members. Many of the elderly people are living into their 80s and 90s, and most of them were born in a distant city up north. The obituary informs us of where they worked and the titles or rank held if the deceased had been in the military. 

I am led to believe their happiest days were after they retired in the beautiful Appalachian Mountains. "He loved to fish and hike," or "she volunteered at Granny's Attic," and always lists the church activities, deacon, elder, Sunday School teacher, or sang in the choir. 

We know the subject of an obit was a native of the area because he was born in Clay County, or born in one of the Georgia counties bordering North Carolina. We learn where he went to school, what he did after graduating from High School, and if he had always lived there. 

If it is an obituary of an elderly woman native to the area, she is lauded for being a great mother and grandmother. She loved quilting or baking or helping at her church. Hardly ever is a job mentioned for this woman. We learn that she was loving and giving and happy in her garden or putting up vegetables from the garden. 

When I first moved to Hayesville, I often found that an obituary of a native would mention that she had worked in one of the mills that flourished there before they were all closed and relocated overseas. That move affected families, especially single mothers, in a negative way as their opportunity to earn a living had ended. There were no other jobs similar to the ones that had been lost. 

There is a big difference between an obituary written by a loving family member and the impersonal ones written by a member of the newspaper staff or the funeral home. I feel a bit sad when I read those not written by someone familiar to the deceased. 

I have written or helped write obituaries for my parents and siblings. It is a heavy undertaking, and I have written my own for my family to have when I am gone. 

Today has been a long day, and I am tired. I began home physical therapy today and went to my chiropractor who helps me so very much. She is the most unusual doctor. She says she is a functional chiropractor, which means she does other kinds of healing even if she has to get down on the floor and work on my poor legs as I sit. 

The world is filled with people who help others in diverse ways. I am grateful for those people who don't necessarily follow the norm, who find more than one tried and true way to make me feel better. 

In a world filled with war, murder, death, and torture, it is often hard to face another day with hope. But I know that hearing about the horrible things going on in our country and around the world will not help me because I can't do anything about those atrocities. But I will concentrate on where I can still be of use to others. I will spend tomorrow working on my new writing class, which begins on June 30. My six students will make me happy, and they will enjoy writing their memories. 

Thanks for stopping by and reading my thoughts tonight. I appreciate you and your comments.