The Power of Love

“When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will know peace.”                                                 ---Jimi Hendrix   

I have been sick for the past week and ended up watching TV when I was not sleeping. With current news on all channels, I found it hard to watch anything that was not depressing.

While scrolling I found a conversation between Trevor Noah and a man named Simon Sinek. Evidently, Simon is widely known for his podcasts. I enjoy Trevor Noah and his outstanding memoir Born a Crime, so I tuned into the podcast. It was long but I was caught up in their conversation and didn't realize how long it was. 

The deep conversation between the two of them was an education for me. They talked about their fears, most embarrassing moments, what they liked, and didn't like, and what they had in common. 

They discussed that few men have these big conversations where they are vulnerable with each other. Simon said he tells his male friends he loves them although, that is something most men will not do. The conversation was about the lonely man with no one he could simply talk to when he had a problem. Simon says men should be able to call a friend and not get advice, but have him listen, simply listen, and support. 

They talked about friendship and how important it is to make lasting friends. I was impressed when Steven said he was lonely and not for people to be around him but for someone who would just be with him. 

"Sit in the mud with me and not try to fix me," he said. How often have I felt that way? When Barry died, all I wanted from friends was for them to sit with me and listen to me as I grieved and tried to find how to go on. No one could fix me.

This conversation between these two men gave me much to think about. They freely talked about their hang-ups. Steven hates small talk. He looks for a corner when he enters a room full of people. Yet he is a very successful speaker and podcast host.  

Like many I know, they find it awkward meeting new people. I was so like them in my youth. I was convinced I was being judged by others, and I knew all my flaws. I convinced myself I was not worthy before I entered the room.

I admire anyone who can walk into a room full of strangers and begin conversations. My husband, Barry, was the best at meeting people. It was not long before strangers were friends. Today, I enjoy meeting new people. 

Now that I am older and more experienced with social situations, I understand that most people have hang-ups about social gatherings. But I no longer feel I am being judged and, if I am, I really don't care. It took years of feeling unworthy before I reached this point. 

Trevor and Steven's conversation moved on to dealing with people who disagree with you. Trevor feels there is room for this divided nation to talk to each other. I hope we can do that.

I am pleased I learned about this South African native who had a difficult childhood in apartheid because he was mixed race. He is concerned that people today who have more material comforts than generations before them, are so unhappy, miserable with their lives, and even suicidal. Perhaps struggle is missing in their lives. When we struggle we are more appreciative of what we achieve.

It proves that too much effort has gone into making money, buying more things, and feeling successful in their big houses. But these things have not made them happy. What a shame that so much effort, energy, and sacrifice is spent on physical things instead of building relationships with people they love. It is only when one grows old and realizes that he is alone or is leaving those he loves, that what he appreciates most are people who care for him, those he has had little time for. 

I saw this in the lives of loved ones. They worked hard and strived to be financially successful. I am grateful they realized their goals. But were their relationships with their families as good as they would have liked? I hope so. 

It seems that the goal in our country today is to be ambitious, selfish, and often greedy if it makes us wealthy. Parents today push their children to go to the best colleges they can afford, to meet others on the same path. Two educated upwardly moving people marry and live the American dream. They never meet or know anyone who is struggling to pay the rent. 

My father never worked to be rich or famous. He never wanted to be above others. He worked to make a living for his family. He wouldn't have known what to do with great riches. His needs were simple.

Young Coy Council

My mother wanted to own a nice car one day. Once all her children were grown, married, and on their own, she saved and scrimped until she could buy that car. We were so happy to see her drive her Cadillac. 

But her purpose in life was to care for her family. She raised kids who made her proud because they were good people. Her eyes lit up and a big smile crossed her face when someone praised her children. 

Parents have the most influence on their children and how they grow up. Trevor Noah quotes his mother all the time. She influenced him by her example. She taught him so much about generosity and caring although she worked and struggled in a country where she could not live with Trevor's father because he was white. When she went out with her son she had to pretend he was not her child. If it was known he was her own, he could be taken from her by the authorities because he was mixed-race.

Governments can make life so hard for the people they govern. 

Our world is filled with refugees who are fleeing dictators, gangs of thieves and murderers, and evil people in power. I awake each day with a prayer of thanksgiving. I am grateful that my life has been filled with love and caring people. I don't know how I could live if I was not surrounded by them. 

My Mother, Lois, when I was a girl

Mother taught me to love and what love means. She loved her brothers and sisters and loved her parents deeply. Growing up with love in her life, she showed us by example. 

At this time in our country when we have such terrible disasters, fires, floods, and hurricanes, all around us, I hope we can all find in our hearts to love, to appreciate, to be generous with what we can do to help. I hope the spirit of meanness that hangs over the USA will evaporate like fog in the morning sun.

This comes from Maria Shriver's recent post concerning the aviation disasters of the past week.

May we think about all the families devastated by this, who lost people that they loved. Let us try to remember that life is fragile, and that we must always do our best to make sure our interactions with one another are kind, loving, supportive because none of us ever know what’s gonna happen in life. So may we always treat each other with grace and with love.