tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8160021015821033799.post6178931222435156438..comments2024-03-13T13:10:03.122-04:00Comments on Writing Life Stories : Saying Goodbye My WayGlenda Beallhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17953170428175025248noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8160021015821033799.post-6966230368130277522009-08-31T10:24:11.549-04:002009-08-31T10:24:11.549-04:00Glenda
I will always remember Barry's memorial...Glenda<br />I will always remember Barry's memorial service. It was focused on him and his life and his music. It told us mourners more about who he was and brought him back to life again. <br /><br />I was impressed too that the room was filled with your friends who came to let you know they understand what you're going through at this time.<br /><br />I like your way of saying good bye, and I might change my mind and my plans afterall.Nancy Simpsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06468975663711270696noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8160021015821033799.post-40491095137703725982009-08-30T00:29:09.852-04:002009-08-30T00:29:09.852-04:00Thank you, Bob, for your well written comment.I...Thank you, Bob, for your well written comment.I've never considered myself to be brave, but I saw bravery in Barry as he tried to protect me from knowing what I think he already knew. I was the one who had the difficulty giving up to Death. I am one who has always tried to "fix" things, but some things cannot be fixed. <br /><br />I just wish we had both been better prepared for what we faced. That is why I think everyone should talk about and learn about all the possibilities available to us before we end up in a hospital under extreme conditions trying to make the right choice.<br />End of life issues must be discussed with doctors who don't want to say "you are dying. There is nothing we can do for you now."<br />But they should be discussed before the need for them to say those words.Glendahttp://www.profilesandpedigrees.blogspot.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8160021015821033799.post-27133697506981870202009-08-29T23:10:50.282-04:002009-08-29T23:10:50.282-04:00Glenda,
We teach by example and most often we lea...Glenda,<br /><br />We teach by example and most often we learn by example. My parents never thought they'd linger...mom in a nursing home for 2 years, dad for six. <br /><br />Bravery is the hardest thing to summon at life's end, yet it's inextricably linked to dignity. Bravery is the spiritual antidote to the fragility of human life. But it seems you and Barry knew this.<br /><br />Those of us who haven't faced what you have will learn from you both.Gridley Fireshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17936267059744060669noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8160021015821033799.post-9982350493990241672009-08-27T17:27:46.103-04:002009-08-27T17:27:46.103-04:00Glenda, I know exactly what you mean about funeral...Glenda, I know exactly what you mean about funerals and open caskets...and such. I couldn't agree more. <br /><br />Anger is natural and one of the first steps forward in the process of acceptance. We are 'only' human and we will all die no matter how much we pray and bargain. <br /><br />"Trust your wound to a teacher's surgery.<br />Flies collect on a wound. They cover it,<br />those flies of your self-protecting feelings,<br />your love for what you think is yours.<br />Let a Teacher wave away the flies<br />and put a plaster on the wound.<br />Don't turn your head.<br />Keep looking at the bandaged place.<br />That's where the Light enters you.<br />And don't believe for a moment<br />that you're healing yourself."<br />Rumioff-linehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12066472351410695644noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8160021015821033799.post-5510548547988371802009-08-27T09:57:23.755-04:002009-08-27T09:57:23.755-04:00Glenda,
What a beautiful piece you've written....Glenda,<br />What a beautiful piece you've written. I totally agree about the open casket and the crying. I don't do well at funerals and cry at the drop of a hat anyway. Your service for Barry was beautiful. Meakin and I both commented to ourselves as we left that we wished we had known Barry because we would have liked him. <br />SamSam Hoffer / My Carolina Kitchenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15358601435867848753noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8160021015821033799.post-42150018298860263832009-08-27T01:34:38.181-04:002009-08-27T01:34:38.181-04:00Thanks everyone for commenting. As you can see my ...Thanks everyone for commenting. As you can see my thoughts are always on what is happening or what happened in my life in the past year. I'm glad the services were beautiful and so thankful to the people who participated. <br />If Barry had been there, he would have gone up to each one and shook hands and thanked them for singing and for saying the nice things they said.<br /><br />Betty and Jerry Bradley gave me the most wonderful book about Losing someone you love. <br />I open it and read a few pages at the time. Today I read that it is not unusual to be angry at God when someone you love has died. I have to admit I'm angry. Barry was the biggest believer in prayer and so many people prayed for him, but still he died. That makes me angry. It means to me that no matter how much you beg for healing, the Higher Power that gives life can take it in a flash. Even good people have to suffer and die. <br />But the book says that is a part of the grief process and in time I will feel better about all this. I trust the book is right.Glendahttp://glendacbeall.blogspot.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8160021015821033799.post-46375470809854121592009-08-26T21:58:46.849-04:002009-08-26T21:58:46.849-04:00That sounds so beautiful, Glenda. You are so righ...That sounds so beautiful, Glenda. You are so right for doing it this way. I recently attended a friend's memorial service, and though it was heartbreaking, it was also beautiful. We didn't have to endure the artificial setting of a funeral home. We shared stories, cried, and even laughed a lot (he left words for us to read). Yes, you did exactly the right thing. A wonderful tribute like the one you gave Barry is so much better.Juliehttp://www.juliebuff.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8160021015821033799.post-19896114653871834432009-08-25T18:35:31.679-04:002009-08-25T18:35:31.679-04:00A wonderful tribute.....A wonderful tribute.....Kathryn Magendiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12863595228298349863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8160021015821033799.post-1627666592347758622009-08-25T15:58:50.397-04:002009-08-25T15:58:50.397-04:00You already know how much I liked the service-but ...You already know how much I liked the service-but after reading your words-I also like how you and Barry thought about it-how you thought about the funeral. You were right.Tipperhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11714281090985487356noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8160021015821033799.post-80150237972339276172009-08-25T14:41:49.295-04:002009-08-25T14:41:49.295-04:00Glenda,
I've attended many funerals in my life...Glenda,<br />I've attended many funerals in my lifetime, but Barry's memorial service was one of the nicest I've ever attended. I think he would have been very pleased. Everyone spoke well, and the music was beautiful. I hope you're doing well.Brenda Kay Ledfordhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03077314514118637590noreply@blogger.com